“What is wrong with kids these days?”

Like me, you’ve probably heard this question asked.

Maybe the better question is “What is wrong with parents these days?”

Kids are unlikely to rise above the example of their parents.  Or, if you reject the idea that the parent’s example is part of the problem, then let me suggest that parents who put little or no restrictions on media are also part of the problem.  Unrestricted media is teaching kids:

• laughs at the cost of others are OK
• violence towards others is an acceptable form of entertainment
• calling others’ names is acceptable
• do whatever you want to do, it’s your life anyway

I am reading through the Book of Proverbs this summer.  Verse by verse, soaking in afresh the immense wells of wisdom and guidance for life that are found there. In fact, I love the introduction, where the author presents the purpose of the book:

The purpose of these Proverbs is to teach people wisdom and discipline, good conduct, and doing what is right, just and fair….  These proverbs will give knowledge and purpose to young people.” (Proverbs 1: 3-4)

Here are some of the treasures found in Proverbs, that if modeled and lived out by parents would be part of giving youth some helpful clues for life:

It is foolish to belittle a neighbor; a person with good sense remains silent. (11:12)

Your own soul is nourished when you are kind, but you destroy yourself when you are cruel (11:17)

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger. (15:1)

In these three sayings alone (and there so many, many more), I find wisdom for how to talk about others and how we talk to others.

I have to reflect and ask myself, what do my kids hear me saying about others?  And, how do I talk to my kids?  If kids hear us as parents speaking badly of others, how can they learn to respect others and to be kind to them?

If we speak harshly to our kids, belittle them, put them down with our tone of voice or words, or make them feel unimportant, of course they will become angry.  I believe that many of the behavior problems manifested in youth come from hearts that are angry from being hurt, and from spirits that have been broken by their very own parents.

Parents, let’s step up and be the example that kids need.  The onus is on us.  It’s not the responsibility of the schools, or society, or even the church, but us to pave the way for the next generation of citizens who understand respect, kindness and the courage it takes to rise above the junk values of mass culture.