The signs were all there.  Uninspired, irritable, edgy, trouble focusing, and truthfully, a bit crispy.

You know you’re overdue for some time away  when the tell tale signs are so visible that your 15 year old daughter asks, “Mom, don’t you think it’s time for you to take a retreat?”

Yes.  And yes.  Why do I always wait so long to go?

Charles’s Christmas gift to me this year was the encouragement to take a monthly retreat, and a commitment on his part to help make it happen by covering the bases at home.

Regular Retreat Rhythms

Both of us believe in regular rhythms of retreat and solitude, however, it’s all too easy to get out of the routine of it.  There’s always a million reasons why it’s not a good time to go. Plus, as an extrovert, it’s just not my natural bent. I go because I know it matters. I’ve found that there’s nothing like a personal retreat in terms of spiritual renewal, rest and refreshment.

With the evidence mounting that a retreat was in order, and no excuses for why not to go, I packed my overnight bags and off I went to The Hermitage, the place I have most regularly gone for retreats over the past 25 years.

I’ve learned the rhythms of retreats from having gone on enough to have figured a few things out.  It wasn’t always that way, though.  I think two of the biggest barriers early on to take a personal retreat were 1)  where will I go and 2) what will I DO??

Where to Go

For me, going to a place like the Hermitage, monastery or designated retreat center is ideal.  Most places like this have extensive grounds upon which to walk, with places to sit and to simply be in nature.

I once got a hotel room in downtown Chicago (I love Chicago) for a personal retreat.  That retreat just didn’t have the same flavor as a place with space, quiet and an environment meant expressly to help retreat goers connect with God.  I thought I would be energized and inspired by the city, but instead I was distracted and lonely.

If a designated retreat center is not possible, find a quiet place where you can be alone, uninterrupted. Libraries, nature centers, and parks are also possibilities.

The scarier question is what to actually DO on retreat.  Wide open spaces, which we generally aren’t all that familiar with, can be daunting.  Here is what NOT to do:

• Keep the iphone on, checking emails, internet and social media.
• Have a big agenda for what to do with your time and what you hope to accomplish.  Spiritual retreats are not about accomplishing tasks.
• Bring a zillion books and things to fill your time.

So having established what not to do, how does one approach a retreat?

What To Do

As much time as you can give to creating space and solitude, the better. We live in a noisy world where we’re bombarded with voices from within and without. It takes time to settle into the silence, to get past the distractions in the head, and to lean into hearing God in the silence. This present retreat was 24 hours.  I do think that God meets us where we’re at. If you have less time, that’s ok.  More time?  All the better.

There’s no need to take a bunch of stuff. The point of a retreat is allowing for space, quiet, thinking time, prayer, and solitude. I usually take a Bible, my journal and maybe one book that I may or not may not read.  So what then do you actually do on retreat?

• Be quiet
• Practice solitude
• Listen attentively

With time, you learn to listen to the nudging of the Spirit, who is ready to guide you on a retreat like this. That’s what you ‘do’ on retreat… simply allow what comes to come.

It’s really simple, yet it can seem so hard to do. That is, until you actually do it and then you wonder why you haven’t ever done this before, or why you waited so long since the last time.

Ready To Give It A Try?

I highly recommend it!  There is nothing like coming apart from the daily routines of life for getting renewed and refreshed. I am pretty certain that you won’t regret it.

Finally, Dallas Willard describes the power of silence and solitude so well:

Lay down your ideas as to what solitude and silence are supposed to accomplish in your spiritual growth. You will discover incredibly good things. One is that you have a soul. Another, that God is near and the universe is brimming with goodness. Another, that others aren’t as bad as you often think. But don’t try to discover these, or you won’t. You’ll just be busy and find more of your own doings. The cure for too-much-to-do is solitude and silence, for there you find you are safely more than what you do. And the cure of loneliness is solitude and silence, for there you discover in how many ways you are never alone.  

How about it?  Do you think you could use a personal retreat?  Why or why not?